Us Weekly

Us Weekly

Here at Stylish, Carrie Bradshaw is a constant source of inspiration. So it should come as no surprise that upon re-watching the first three seasons of Sex and the City, we fell down the rabbit hole of trying to find the perfect blingy pinky ring like the one that Carrie wears until it gets stolen in a mugging post-affair with Big. The karma on that wasn’t great, but what was worse was the absence of sparkly pinky jewels! When it comes to the last digit, you can find signet rings galore but you’re hard pressed to find a diamond.

That’s what we thought until we saw a photo of Lucy Hale rocking a simple diamond pinky ring from Fred and Far on her Instagram account— and the rest was history. We were sold. Glamorous and affordable (south of $400 for a big gemstone is a good deal), we were already in love. But, it turns out, the Fred and Far. story isn’t just about good jewelry that looks striking on the hand (which is why brand also counts Yara Shahidi as a fan). Check out our interview with the founder of the brand, Melody Godfred, here!

Stylish: First off — why pinky rings as opposed to any other kind of jewelry?

Melody Godfred: I wanted the Self Love Pinky Ring to be dedicated to a specific finger, the way an engagement ring is. The only finger I had never worn a ring on was my pinky. You can say I was neglecting it, just like I was neglecting myself at the time when I started the company. I reclaimed myself, and claimed the pinky as my reminder!

The pinky, the most underappreciated, overlooked finger on our hands and it is also the strongest. Without the pinky, we would lose 50 percent of our hand strength. I thought this was a great metaphor for what the ring stands for: a reminder of self. As women, we neglect ourselves, even though we are so powerful and critical to the lives of everyone around us. What would happen if we redirected some of that energy inwards? And, of course, there’s also the pinky promise was a big part of my childhood (I grew up in the 1980’s!). And we all know that a pinky promise is sacred and can’t be broken. I wanted to carry that energy into this ring by asking women to make a pinky promise with themselves.

Stylish: How’d you come up with the idea for the ring?

The origin of the brand is deeply personal. I never set out to start a business. In early 2015, I was already a successful entrepreneur balancing my company, motherhood and marriage. I had a lovely husband, a home… everything I always thought I wanted.  And yet despite “having it all” I wasn’t happy. I felt crushed by the weight of the responsibilities I carried, because I didn’t know how to take care of myself or choose myself.

Jewelry has always been my family’s way of commemorating milestones, so I decided to treat myself to a new ring with the idea that I would wear it on a new finger (my pinky) and use is as a daily reminder to take care of myself. I started to work out for the first time in years. I started seeing a therapist to delve a lifetime of unresolved feelings. I reconnected with who I was, and got comfortable with being myself in all moments, the easy ones and the hard. After a month or two, the change in me was so profound.

MG: Every detail is with intention. I chose the inverted triangle as our symbol, both for our brand (you’ll see it in our logo) and for the details of the ring, because it is an ancient symbol of the divine feminine. By leveraging this symbol, we infused the ring with this magical energy, which all women carry. The shape of the stone is a trillion, which is a triangle, and we also use triangle prongs, and triangle cutouts on the basket of the ring.

Because the energy of the ring is so important to me, I also chose to use lab-created stones, which are biologically and visually identical to natural stones, but are kinder to the environment and conflict-free. Our signature stone is the White Sapphire, because its metaphysical properties align with our mission: it promotes self awareness, wisdom, intuition, integrity and positivity.

Unlike other pinky rings that are traditionally either simple signets or bands, I wanted this ring to be as bold as an engagement ring. If you’re going to wear a symbol of self commitment, shouldn’t it be as special as the ring you wear to symbolize your commitment to someone else?

Stylish: And what’s next for the design?

MG: In the coming year, we’re working on offering a more personalized experience, where you can work with a medium/clairvoyant/energy worker to determine which stone would be most beneficial to you. Then we would create a custom stone with custom mantras and guidance to go along with it.

Stylish: Why pick jewelry as opposed to a bag or accessory or any kind of clothing for that matter as a memento of self-love?

MG: Whether you’re married or not, the idea of an engagement ring symbolizing commitment is deeply embedded in our collective psyche. By using a bold ring as our symbol, we’re using this ring to co-opt that awareness and messaging and transform it into a symbol of self commitment and self love. There’s a lot of ritual that goes into wearing jewelry that is also important. Each morning when I put on my Self Love Pinky Ring, I reaffirm my commitment to myself, and each evening when I take it off, I reflect on how I did that day. Did I practice self care, in my actions, in my thinking? And throughout it all, my ring is my reminder that I deserve to exist joyfully and happily in my own life.

We’ve all been sold the story that a woman’s worth is measured by the ring she gets from her fiance. It’s time we dismantle that story. I believe the Self Love Pinky Ring gives women a way to choose themselves instead of waiting to be chosen. I don’t think another accessory could make the same statement.

Stylish: What are your favorite stones that you’ve used? What can we expect to see next?

MG: Of all the stones we’ve done so far, my two favorites are Black Spinel and Emerald. Both are metaphysically aligned with my needs personally, and attract and carry the most powerful energy. Black Spinel is great because “all black everything” is my go to fashion mantra. Emerald happens to be my birthstone, so I’m partial. It’s been really fun to see women wear their birthstones and make the ring that much more intimate and personal. Because the response to the colored gems has been so positive, we will launch limited runs of one gem each month in the new year. We’ve had a ton of requests for Citrine and Garnet, so those are high on the list.

Stylish: What’s next for your brand and what would you like to accomplish?

MG: The ring is simply a symbol, a reminder, a mirror of our intentions. It may sound silly to say that it can and will change your life, but it can and will, if you channel your energy through it.

My ultimate goal is that when someone sees a woman wearing a Self Love Pinky Ring walking down the street, they will think, “There goes a chosen woman.” Because she is.

Stylish:  Who are your muses?

MG: I find inspiration everywhere, but especially in our tribe. I follow every woman who buys a Self Love Pinky Ring on Instagram so I can witness and celebrate their journeys. Now that we’re a little over two years old, I’ve been able to see the impact the Self Love Pinky Ring (and the pinky promise pledge that goes with it) has made on these women, and it brings me to tears daily. .

One early tribe member of ours who deeply inspires me is actor and activist Yara Shahidi. She uses her platform not just to entertain, but to elevate and engage her audience. Tracee Ellis Ross is also a big inspiration because she is unabashedly and delightfully herself, and she is redefining what it means to be a joyful woman in her forties without kids or a relationship.