The era of women's empowerment is exploring new depths, thanks to the global shift towards recognizing the importance of self love and self care. Melody Godfred, founder of Fred and Far was an integral forerunner of the self love movement. In adopting the philosophy that “Self love is the foundation of all love,” Self Love Philosopher Melody Godfred was quick to realize that lasting female empowerment was impossible outside of a cultural awakening to the need for internal self-fulfillment. Thus the Self Love Pinky Ring and subsequent movement were born, giving women around the world a symbolic and daily reminder of their intrinsic worth and power.
The beauty of the Self Love Pinky Ring is that it’s not tied to one’s status as singled or partnered, but rather is about honoring wholeness within yourself either way. Since its founding, the Self Love Pinky Ring and movement have gone viral several times over as seen in Vogue, Elle, Cosmopolitan, InStyle, Refinery29, US Weekly, Self Magazine, Martha Stewart Weddings, and more. With a passion for the movement further fueled by celebrities from Tracee Ellis Ross, Lilly Singh, Viola Davis, Yara Shahidi, Amber Rose, and more. Quickly making the Self Love Pinky Ring the must-have anti-engagement ring of the moment.
Recently, we sat down with Melody to better understand what catalyzed the Fred and Far movement and why she feels its message of self love has had the monumental impact it has. She shared with us the origin story of Fred and Far and why she feels the brand has struck such a chord with the modern woman.
What inspired you to choose yourself and start practicing self love?
My life's work as a self love author and community leader has very much been about finding my way home to myself. By 2015, I had hit every milestone I had ever dreamed of: a great career, husband, kids, a home. And yet, I was lost, unhappy, and disconnected from my true, authentic self due to a profound lack of self love and self care. I was taking care of everyone and everything— except myself.
My tipping point came when I was a new mother. My twin daughters were born six weeks early, and from that moment began the race to keep them safe and help them thrive. I was predisposed to sacrifice myself in service to others, but it reached a new level. By pursuing perfection and trying to control every outcome in order to protect my daughters, I broke myself apart and damaged my marriage as well. I had to learn that not only did I deserve my own love and care, but my very survival also depended on it.
I desperately needed a bold, beautiful daily reminder to choose, honor, and remember myself. So I created one. This is how the very first Self Love Pinky Ring came to be. I never set out to start a business. I set out to change my own life. Since this was the biggest commitment of my lifetime, I wanted it to be as significant in style as an engagement ring. I wore it on a finger I had never worn a ring on before, my pinky because I wanted this ring to make a bold statement that was instantly recognizable.
How did your life change when you started wearing a Self Love Pinky Ring?
Within a month, I felt myself and my life-transforming. I realized that instead of pursuing perfection, which made me and everyone around me feel like nothing was ever good enough, I started pursuing authenticity. I got to know my true self and reframed my life so it would honor her. My self-acceptance brought me closer to myself and healed my relationships and cultivated a life for my family that we could all enjoy being part of. I thought to myself, "If this worked for me, maybe it can work for other women as well." And so I created Fred and Far, a brand where every detail is imbued with my heart and passion for empowering women.
In less than two years, women in 40+ countries joined me in making a pinky promise to choose themselves each and every day. They signed our pinky pledge card and boldly shared their commitments with the world. And through our social media platforms and website, I've had the great privilege of witnessing these extraordinary women, sharing their stories, and cultivating a powerful community of women who believe that self love and sisterhood will save the planet (because they will).
What inspired you to start writing books about self love?
While a piece of jewelry played a central role in the launch and growth of this company, it is only one small piece of a much greater intention, mission, and movement. The first phase of this company was devoted to asking women to choose themselves. Since then, I've expanded into phase two of the company, which is about answering the question, "HOW, do I choose, love, and care for myself?"
It was from that place that The ABCs of Self Love and Self Love Poetry for Thinkers and Feelers were birthed. I wanted to empower women with practical tools to make self love and care an intrinsic and actionable part of everyday life.
The ABCs of Self Love includes everything I've learned at the helm of this movement, and also on my own personal self love journey. It is designed to be an easy read, where you can explore one letter a day through narrative text, inspiring quotes, and practical action items that transform ideas into habits.
Self Love Poetry for Thinkers and Feelers is a collection of 200 poems that represent the very best of the poetry I've written over the past four years while exploring self love. The book is a reflection of 2020 and honors both our hope and resilience as we’ve navigated an unprecedented year.
What is the takeaway you want women reading this interview to leave with?
And if this movement has taught me anything, it’s that making a purchase here, or any purchase for that matter, isn't required to make self love part of your story. You simply have to decide that you're ready to choose yourself and to do the daily work it takes to make self love and care a habit instead of a luxury. The Self Love Pinky Ring is designed to be a reminder and symbol of this commitment and our community.
The magic though, the transformative change, that comes directly from you.